The Birth of the Backstory
What I hoped to share here on Substack
I started “An Artist’s Backstory” here on substack on March 17th of 2024 ( Technically I had a coming soon post in January). The last line in that first post sums up what my intention was for writing:
As I write, I hope to share with the reader the voice in my head that drives my creative process.
Revisiting the birth of this project made me think more deeply about the role creativity holds in my life today and going forward. The process of creating something authentic with the intention of expressing my true self requires a disregard to measures of success or importance outside of my control.
Art, for me; is a journey of self discovery. I find myself asking who I am and where I should place myself in the larger world? These writings help me answer those questions.
Some of my writing took me into feminist history. I would not be who I am without women fighting for the freedoms I enjoyed as a young woman just starting out in life. In a post titled Gamble. I wrote about Margaret Sanger who formed The “Birth Control League” and went on to successfully lobby congress to allow medical professionals to prescribe birth control
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Other posts were connected to my family history. In Stranger in a Strange Land, I shared the story of my grandfather, who like my father was a man who fully respected and encouraged the women in their family. I believe my grandfather was a feminist, although he may not have used the term. He demonstrated his feminist sensibilities in an era of firmly defined gender roles. As I wrote I realized how I instinctively choose a partner who is like my father and grandfather. A man who was raised in the 50’s by parents who worked collaboratively to raise a family. He is a feminist.
Naptime is a portrait of my beautiful grandson in neutral colors. The post looks back into my own history. As an art educator a part of my job was creating visual problems for my students and helping them work out a solution using compositional structures. In this post I shared my thought process as I select and work on a project. The subject matter was not what sparked the project. I was making a departure from a successful compositional formula.
In writing I sometimes go down a rabbit hole of research that has produced many potential projects. My favorite rabbit hole this year was Rex Ray. I have an ongoing Pinterest board where I collect images of his work or work that borrows from his ideas. It turned out that he was like me, from Colorado and close to my age.
He moved from his home state after the rise of the evangelical movement in Colorado Springs. I remember that period of time and the struggles between conservative communities like the Springs and liberal communities like Boulder where I lived. Being gay was not easily accepted where Ray lived with his family, so he headed to San Francisco.
His backstory drew me in, but seeing a documentary of him cutting and layering his hand printed papers immediately sent a charge into my visual brain. Today I am working privately with my own hand printed fabrics in layers. I look forward to sharing more in 2025.
In June I wrote a post about how difficult I found making work as commentary. I included the story of Guernica, possibly Picasso’s most important work that was created in opposition to the bombing in the town of of Guernica by the Germans. I love this painting. Its impact when seen in person is so powerful. It is an example of how an artist can be a force for change.
Guernica is a massive painting. It measures 11 feet tall and 25 feet wide. Picasso wisely chose scale over color. The entire composition is in blocks of blacks, whites, and grays. The figures and their expression of terror are dramatically outsized. It makes anyone who stands in front of it feel powerless.
I began the Guernica post to highlight “Army of Compassion”. This piece was included in Utah’s Statewide Annual Exhibition of the Best of Contemporary Art in Utah. The composition referenced the American flag. In the piece I used a photograph of my Dad as boy dressing up like Roosevelt’s rough riders. Three words were repeated on the red stripes: Tolerance, Compassion, and Acceptance.
I believe these core values are critical for a fully functioning democracy. To me, they are just as important as an army to defend the country. I couldn’t imagine that a reasonable person would argue against this idea.
At the opening of my post, I shared the following:
Utah, in particular Southern Utah where I live, is MAGA territory. Not just traditional conservatives, but I would say a large number of those who support extreme positions on everything from gun rights to gay rights. I do not hold these beliefs and can’t put my mind around how anyone could. I try to not add fuel to the fire of negativity.
That opening paragraph angered one reader. I received a very long email from her that was so offensive, I had to sit with it for several days before I could process her feedback. (*She was someone from my community who had taken a class from me and had seen this piece at our local museum.)
The writer accused me of many things including of being dumb enough to think that climate change was real, voting for a President that had dementia, of supporting taking away her firearms, and (the worst) not understanding that all gay men are emotionally dysfunctional. I wrote a concise, thoughtful, and gentle response.
The event made me think about setting limits to my expression. Why put things out in a world where those very values I had included in “Army of Compassion” were things of the past? Why not just pretend I was in agreement or at least stay silent? Should I go along to get along?
Art can capture ideas, convey emotions, and reveal perspectives. I don’t want to contribute to a world where expression is suppressed. We can all learn from each other and be open to divergent points of view. Silence isn’t golden.
Wishing everyone JOY in abundance in 2025.
Until next time…….
Oh, Margaret, I so identify with your crusader spirit and love how you bring it to visual expression for me (and others) to absorb and enjoy. I concur with Sara Lamb's comments too. I'm so glad you are where you are and able to represent your values so beautifully. Merci and happy new year! Nan
“Silence isn’t golden.“ This is a powerful idea, and takes courage. Your strength in putting your ideas and images out there, and your strength responding to an oppositional commenter are just what we need now. Thank you. Thoughtful post.